WHEN EAST MEETS WEST
Commentary By Hank Miller Jr.
Note: Hank was born and raised in Gloucester City, NJ and now lives with his family in Japan.
A Friend called and said that he\’d like to visit the countryside.
So I said you\’ve decided to escape to the countryside for a long holiday weekend.
The friend said that he\’s longing to visit Kyushu since he\’s left here 10 years ago to live and work in Tokyo.
Well fine,but if you\’re wanting to get intouch with nature,be prepared.
If you to an island like mine,you will have entered a world cut off not only from the city life,but from the mainland as well.
Without a large major city nearby and the nearest being more than more 86 kilometers away.
It\’s like having an extra dose of countryside.
We\’re real country bumpkins.
While it is said that the Japanese are getting taller,on our island, they\’re actually getting shorter.
people live so long that they\’re more bent over every year until finally they just disapear into the ground.
This is the real meaing of Japan\’s
\” shrinking population.\”
Rarely do you find a large groupe of elderly people all living in one place, like our own old folks island.
I bet those bent-over
\”o-baa-chans\”wish they had listened to their mother\’s advice about posture now.
On the other hand,this is one of our secrets to being closer to nature.
From your bird\’s eye view, we may appear as just an ant colony,but it is likely that we are mearly relatives of the\”Inch High Samurai.\” We are proud to be an island of country bumpkin munchkins.
Since you\’ll already feel like a Tokyo high-rise walking around here, I reccommend that you city ladies not wear high heels.Besides,in the countryside,you\’ll want as much sole space as is possible to hinder those agressive crawling insecte.
Imagine encountering a centipede in your path:
Just your two legs against one hundred !
You\’d better make sure your two shoes have large soles.
Propper foot attire in these parts,for both men and women is,\”nagagutsu\”(literally, \”long shoes\”).
These 100 percent rubber boots are one size fits all.Don\’t worry,even you have a hugh \”gaijin\” foot,it will have shrunk to the perspiring all day inside these and will leave a slight scent,if you know just what I mean.
Men will be glad to know that they have special priviledges here on the island. Go ahead, sidle up to the portside or,if you\’re near the beach, freely walk over to the water\’s edge in full daylight and-pee!
If you really want to blend in with the locals, board one of the numerous fishing boats tied up around the port and pee off the edge of the boat.
No respectful fisherman would pee anywhere else. Now you know why the sea is so salty.
Once on the island, you must relize that you have entered the food chain. you\’ll have preditors here, mainly mosquiros. you will notice that the islanders wear a certain type of uniform made especially to keep the mosquitoes off them.
This means head-to toe coverage consisting of: Nagagutsu,long pants,a long-sleev shirt with extra coverage over the forearm (for protection against the mosquitoes with extra large fangs), gloves,a towel tied over the head to keep the mosquitoes out of the ears,and a straw hat to set off the outfit.
Islands misquitoes are the kind, preferring buffet style lunches and a gaijin.
Do not underestimate them. Should you not heed my advice, you will not only attract mosquitoes who will dine on you, but also frogs who dine on mosquitoes who dine on you.
And the frogs attract snakes who dine on the frogs who dine on the misquitoes who dine on you.
I recommend going a step further and wearing your own personal misquito coil tucked inside a metal sachet tied to the hip.
A smoldering misquito coil will keep away the misquitoes,frogs and snakes too.
Do not be surprised if your awaken by a chime every morning at 0600 a.m. This is not the call to prayer,but the call to the gardens.
It seems that the early morning is the time to commune with nature and talk to your vegestables. They abosolutely will not listen after noon.
Besides with no machines or animals to help plow the fields,island people must do their plowing while the weather is still cool.
Hunched over our hand- plows keeps us in touch with nature.
We\’re an island of country bumpkins munchin\’mumchkins.
Warm Regards From Kitakyushu City, Japan
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