Commentary by Hank F. Miller Jr.

 

Barack Obama\’s half brother, Barracuda Obama, is doing well in Japan and wishes the Illinois senator luck in his quest for the U.S. presidency, the Tokyo Shimbum newspaper reported last Tuesday.

In its annual April Fool\’s Day hoax feature, the Tokyo based newspaper published a story about a 39-year old Asian-African businessman who recently learned he was a child born to Obama\’s Kenyan father and an Asian woman.

Barack Obama Sr. divorced the senator\’s mother, Ann Dunham, in mid-1960s.The spoof says Barracuda was born as the first of four children after Obama Sr. remarried his second wife in Nairobi.

The story says Barracuda speaks fluent Japanese and studied business administration in Japan after graduating top in his class in Kenya He works for a Japanese trading company and specializes in dealing in rare metals.

\”The tradition of publishing hoax stories on April Fools\’ Day began in 2001.The article went on to mention they thought the article about Mr. Obama would entertain their readers, \”said the editor Kenji Zaitoku.

Barracuda acknowledges in the fake interview that he was suspicious with Barack Obama, especially because of the similarity in their names. But the full details were not disclosed to him until late last year.

\”I\’d like to meet (Barack) soon and have a conversation with him,\” Barracuda is quoted as saying to Tokyo Shimbum newspaper.

The paper accompanied the article with a highlight explaining it was a joke, as well as an image of a suntanned Japanese salertman with the caption saying it was Barracuda Obama.

Although Tokyo Shimbum\’s annual April Fools\’ Day features were met with complaints when they first appeared in 2001, none of its readers was taken in Tuesday or called the editorial office fuming over Barracuda\’s lack of authenticity.

The Japan Times on Tuesday published a spoof about the return of an extinct bird at the Alien Wildlife Quarantine Shelter, but in keeping with its April 1 tradition, which predates the Tokyo Shimbum\’s by several years, did not add a disclaimer.

The Yomiuri Shimbum newspaper, the Asahi Shimbum newspaper and the Mainichi Shimbum newspaper said they chose not to join in the spirit of April Fools\’ Day and played it straight.

 

 

Warm Regards from Hank & Keiko Miller from Warm and Sunny Kitakyushu City, Japan

\”Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl\”.

The priest asks, \”Is that you, little Joey Pagano?\”

\”Yes, Father, it is.\”

\”And who was the girl?\”

\”I can\’t tell you, Father, I don\’t want to ruin her reputation\”

\”Well, Joey, I\’m sure to find out her name sooner or later, so you may as well tell me now. Was it Tina Minetti?\”

\”I cannot say.\”

\”Was it Teresa Mazzarelli?\”

\”I\’ll never tell.\”

\”Was it Nina Capelli?\”

\”I\’m sorry, but I cannot name her.\”

\”Was it Cathy Piriano?\”

\”My lips are sealed.\”

\”Was it Rosa Di Angelo, then?\”

\”Please, Father, I cannot tell you.\”

The priest sighs in frustration. \”You\’re very tight lipped, Joey Pagano, and

I admire that, but you\’ve sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar

boy now for 4 months. Now you go and behave yourself.\”

Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend Franco slides over and

whispers, \”What\’d you get?\”

\”4 months vacation and five good leads.\”

WEEKLY HONOR ROLL
BASEBALL: Chris Discher (Cherry Hill/Cherry Hill West) went 7-15 (.467) at the plate last week, including a five-hit game against Kean. Discher hit safely in all three games to extend his hitting streak to five.
LACROSSE: Matt Bell (Jackson/Jackson) totaled nine points on five goals and four assists in two Stockton victories last week.
SOFTBALL: Natalie Berrios (Vineland/Vineland) went 10-16 (.625) while registering four multi-hit games and driving in five RBI last week.
MEN’S OUTDOOR TRACK & FIELD: Tony DeFeo (Mays Landing/Oakcrest) was Stockton’s top finisher at the Osprey Open, placing second out of 26 competitors in the hammer throw (43.99m).
WOMEN’S OUTDOOR TRACK & FIELD: Meredith Malloy (Hamilton/Hamilton West) won the 5000-meter run by over a minute (18:24.35) and broke the school record by 25 seconds at the Osprey Open.

LATEST RESULTS

Baseball (15-7, 3-4 NJAC)
Rutgers-Camden 3, Stockton 0
Stockton 19, Kean 9
Kean 12, Stockton 9

Lacrosse (6-4, 1-0 Skyline)
Stockton 9, Susquehanna 8
Stockton 12, Farmingdale St. 11 (OT)

Softball (17-5, 2-4 NJAC)
Stockton 10, John Jay 0 (5)
Stockton 16, John Jay 0 (5)
Stockton 4, Rutgers-Newark 0
Stockton 15, Rutgers-Newark 2 (5)
College of New Jersey 2, Stockton 1
College of New Jersey 7, Stockton 0

Track & Field
No team scoring at Osprey Open

UPCOMING EVENTS (Home opponents in CAPS)

Monday, April 7
Baseball @ College of New Jersey 3:30 pm

Tuesday, April 8
Softball vs. ROWAN 3 pm

Wednesday, April 9
Baseball @ Ursinus 3:30 pm

Thursday, April 10
Softball @ FDU-Florham 3 pm

Friday, April 11
Baseball vs. RUTGERS CAMDEN 3:30 pm

Saturday, April 12
Women’s Rowing @ Knecht Cup
Track & Field @ College of New Jersey Invitational
Lacrosse vs. KEAN 1 pm
Softball @ William Paterson 1 pm
Baseball @ Rutgers-Newark (DH) 4 pm
(at First Energy Park, Lakewood)

Stockton Athletics Website

http://www.timesargus.com

The Vermont Legislature worked quickly to craft the bill after a special request from Rep. Peter Welch. During a visit to Iraq in January, the congressman dined with Holt at a forward base outside Baghdad. He asked the troops whether they had any special requests for when they got home. Holt, an avid sportsman, said he\’d really like to hunt a moose.

The Legislature obliged, moving a bill that gives Vermont veterans first crack at five of the state\’s sought-after moose permits.

Friends and family said the opportunity would be particularly thrilling for Holt. Todd Berte, Holt\’s brother-in-law, said it\’s difficult to overstate Holt\’s passion for hunting.
read more

source www.philly.com

 

(Note from Albert Countryman, GCN Editor: Due to poor fact checking on my part, there were inaccuracies in last week\’s article concerning the recent Gloucester City Council meeting.. The Gloucester City News apologizes for these mistakes, and any confusion or misunderstanding they have created.)

By Albert J. Countryman Jr.

Gloucester City Council approved an ordinance on second reading during its March 27 meeting limiting the number of pets per household to three.

Also, all dogs and cats must be on a leash while outside.

Those residents who currently own more than three pets will be grandfathered.

Also, last week\’s article was wrong about proposed four-way stops at various intersections.

The intention of the ordinance, passed on first reading, is to \”both calm traffic and address dangerous intersections,\” Mayor William James said.

The article indicated this as a solution to problems on Market Street, which was incorrect.

The ordinance provides for all-way stops at the following intersections:

North Brown and Middlesex streets; Johnson Boulevard and Chambers Avenue; Essex Street and Collings Road; Park Avenue and Klemm, Station and Reading avenues; Park and Gehrig avenues; King and Essex streets; King and Hudson streets; King and Market streets; King Street, Jersey Avenue and Water Street; Burlington and Middlesex streets; Burlington and Cumberland streets; Sussex and Somerset streets; Lane and Powell streets; Thompson and Harley avenues; Greenwood and Park avenues; and Atlantic Avenue and Cumberland Street.

GARSON / GAWRONSKI WALTER C., Sr.

On April 4, 2008. Age 81. Of Brooklawn. Loving husband of 60 years to Dolores Garson (nee Powell). Beloved father of Walter,Jr. (Lynn), Stephen J. (Cheryl), Lawrence J. (Judith), and Gail T. (John) Garson. Loving Grandfather of 9 and Great-grand father of 10. Walter proudly served in the U.S.Army Air Corp.

 

He was a member of the Brooklawn American Legion Post #72. Walter worked for over 40 years at Westinghouse of Lester, Pa.

 

Relatives and friends are invited to attend his viewing on Friday evening from 7 to 9 PM and Saturday from 9 to 10 AM at the McCANN-HEALEY FUNERAL HOME: 851 Monmouth Street, Gloucester City. Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated 10:30 AM at St. Mary\’s R.C.Church: 426 Monmouth St., Gloucester City. Interment with Military Honors at New Saint Mary\’s Cemetery, Bellmawr.

 

Expressions of Sympathy can be e-mailed to the family through our funeral home website www.mccannhealey.com under online obituaries of Walter C. Garson, Sr.
Funeral Arrangements and Inquiries may be made through McCann-Healey Funeral Home: 851 Monmouth St., Gloucester City, N.J. 08030 Phone: 856-456-1142

Funeral services were held for Joseph T. Sexton, 56, of Waco, Texas, who passed away on March 22, 2008, after battling along illness.

Longtime resident of Gloucester City, where he attended Gloucester High and was also an altar boy at Saint Mary\’s Church. A lifetime member of the VFW Post 3620 in Gloucester City. 

Survived by three children, Fawn, Joseph and Howard, four grandchildren, Mallorie, MacKenzie, Joelynn and Addison. Dear friend Cathi (nee Rusk) McCool, formerly of Gloucester City, who is the mother of the named children above. Brother James Culver and nephew Little Jim, both of Gloucester City

 

 

Read more www.rowanathletics.com

Left hander Joe Cichy

Box Score

CAMDEN, NJ – The Rowan University baseball team defeated Rutgers-Camden, 4-2 in a New Jersey Athletic Conference (NJAC) game on Monday.

Rowan improves to 17-7 overall and 4-4 in the conference. Rutgers-Camden has a 7-16 record and a 1-6 NJAC mark. Left hander Joe Cichy (sr. Vineland, NJ/St. Augustine Prep) got the win on the mound for the Profs. Cichy (2-2) went 8.1 innings, allowing two runs on two hits and striking out six batters. Right hander Kevin O’Hara (jr. Clayton, NJ/Gloucester Catholic) pitched the final 0.2 innings to earn his third save of the season. Scarlet Raptors’ lefty Andrew Lihotz (sr. Philadelphia, PA/Northeast) took the loss. Liholtz (2-3) gave up three runs in seven innings.

The Profs were led by third baseman Paul Urbanovich (sr. Rutherford, NJ/St. Peter’s Prep) with three hits (four at bats), three runs scored, one RBI, a double and a triple. Designated hitter Tom Reindel (jr. Flemington, NJ/Hunterdon Central) and catcher Robert Fox (sr. Ocean Twp., NJ/Ocean Twp.) each had two hits (four at bats) and one RBI. Second baseman Joe Franceschini (sr. Toms River, NJ/Toms River E.) scored one run.

For Rutgers-Camden, third baseman Kyle Ballay (so. Delran, NJ/Delran) recorded one hit (four at bats) and two RBIs. Shortstop Shawn Park (sr. West Berlin, NJ/St. Joseph’s (Hammonton)) and pinch runner Dennis Hill (fr. Pilesgrove, NJ/Woodstown) scored one run apiece.

Rowan went ahead 2-0 in the top of the fourth inning. Urbanovich drove in Franceschini with a triple to left center. Reindel followed with a single to right field that plated Urbanovich. The Profs added a run in the seventh. Urbanovich got on base with a double. He move to third on a deep fly to right field and scored on a throwing error. Rowan added an insurance run in the top of the ninth when Fox doubled in Urbanovich, who reached base with a single. In the bottom half, Ballay hit a two run single to left center, bringing home Hill and Park.

Related: Rowan